Caregiver Tips: Depression and your Romantic Partner

One of the best ways to identify what is going on with someone is to see how they make you feel. Someone with mania may have you feeling like a tornado just hit you - you'll feel exhausted and disorganized. When you date someone with depression, you may feel like you’re being dragged down into a place that you don’t know how to get out of. It can make you feel isolated and that no one can relate to you. 

Some people have not developed their boundaries as fully as they may think, and when trying to maintain a relationship with someone with depression, they can become depressed as well. Something that is important to keep in mind is that when someone is depressed, it is not about you. You did not cause them to feel upset, and you must remind yourself of this so as to not take it personally.

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It's important to separate the illness from the person. People with depression can seem to be manipulative at times, but it is not the person him- or herself who is manipulative. The depression leads to manipulative behavior, and you must remember not to blame your partner for this. 

One final tip is to be aware of what your issues are and be sure to separate them from your partner's issues. Just because something doesn't make you feel hopeless, you cannot say it will not or should not trigger your partner. Some things will make them feel more depressed, and you may not understand. That's fine. Keep an open mind and ask questions if you are unsure. 


If you feel like you are becoming depressed, seeking counseling can help you stay in your relationship without sacrificing your happiness. 

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