WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE NONJUDGMENTAL ABOUT YOUR ADULT ADHD?

We all strive to be nonjudgmental and accepting of others, and we expect the same in return. Everyone makes mistakes: makes the occasional snap judgment, is overly critical, or forgets to think before they speak. I don’t need to tell you that no one is perfect.
 
While the adults with ADHD that I work with strive to be accepting and nonjudgmental of their friends, families, coworkers, and even strangers, very few naturally try to withhold judgmental on their own actions, particularly as they pertain to the difficult symptoms of ADHD.
 
Even if those around us withhold judgment when we forget our responsibilities or struggle in a social setting, it takes a great deal more effort to have the same level of acceptance towards ourselves.
 
I’m here to explain what it means to be accepting and nonjudgmental about your symptoms as an adult with ADHD. Let’s dive in.
 
How You Speak to Yourself
It’s just as important to be mindful of how you’re speaking to yourself as it is with others. Before you launch hurtful invective at yourself for forgetting to take out the trash or struggling to complete an assignment as work, think twice. If your best friend spoke to you the same way you speak to yourself, would you keep them as your best friend?
 
Instead of being critical, be productive. Ask yourself why something happened and think about a creative solution to the problem for the future.
 
Seek Out the Good Things
We have a tendency to notice and remember the “bad” things more than the good. The next time you’re tempted to berate yourself for one of your symptoms, pause, recognize what you’re doing, and change directions. Don’t worry about changing the underlying behavior—simply practice more self-compassion and try to understand why you’re doing something.
 
While adult ADHD often makes everyday life more difficult, no one with this disorder is without incredible qualities in equal measure. Remind yourself what yours are as much as possible!
 
Change Your Perspective
It is tempting to see our symptoms as purely negative. It’s only natural when adult ADHD is interfering with our ability to succeed at home, at work, or in social settings. But I’m here to tell you with a mindful, judgment free approach to your ADHD, you can start seeing the “bad” in a new light.
 
I’ve seen adults with ADHD manage to turn their symptoms into something positive. By withholding judgment, you may be able to start seeing them as positive, the things that make you unique. For example, a noisy, chaotic mind is often a creative mind.
 
Reframe your disorganization as a symptom of your creativity instead of your ADHD. Besides, it’s been said that a messy desk makes for a more creative life.
 
Overall, the best way to approach your ADHD in a nonjudgmental and accepting way is to think about how you expect yourself to treat others and turn that positivity inward.
 
Mindfulness of the negative messages you’re sending yourself is the first step to a less judgmental vision of your ADHD. I’m not saying ADHD doesn’t create difficulties in our lives, but we certainly don’t needed the added pressure of an internal monologue that uses valuable energy for coping to make judgments on a disorder that is sometimes beyond our control.
 
Check back for more on mindfulness or for a daily reminder about how to live judgment free with your adult ADHD.

Your adult ADHD diagnosis means that day-to-day tasks that seem simple to others can be daunting, but there’s no reason to despair. With knowledge and counseling, your symptoms are manageable. To learn more about strategies for tackling the symptoms of adult ADHD, Cloud Counseling today and schedule a free 30-min consultation.